Week 36 – Excited…panicked...calm…emotional…repeat
A peek inside my brain:
I can't wait to meet my sweet baby girl….oh my goodness I hope she doesn't come today I have so much to do…can I handle life with two babies…I'm so tired….I wonder if we will ever agree on a name…how am I going to have enough energy for two kids...I'm so tired….I'm so excited to have another sweet baby girl in my arms...I really need to unpack her room…I'm so tired.
As I move into the last weeks of my pregnancy, I think EVERY emotion is running through my body. I honestly think I've been in denial a little bit that this baby is actually coming. When a toddler is your main focus every day, it's easy to forget you're even pregnant. At least in the early months, these days there are actually lots of reminders that I'm pregnant. Every time I change positions now, I get a nice little jab of pain to remind me. =) Also my belly gets in the way more now and my energy level seems to be at an all-time low. I feel like I have to psyche myself up for every diaper change or battle to get in the bathtub now. With all of that said, I'm trying to soak up every last moment with my daughter. It makes me emotional every time I think about her becoming a big sister. I also get nervous about how the transition will be for her. I know I am giving her a gift of a sibling, but she IS MY WHOLE WORLD! How will there be room for another? And yep…there goes the emotional side of me…my eyes are filling up with tears as I type. I know I am not the first, nor the last person to feel these emotions. I'm sure we will all transition to a new life as a family of 4 just fine, but goodness gracious the anticipation is crazy!
Ok…got to change the subject before I start weeping. My doctor check-up went well this week. The baby is still very active and head down! I am still having lots of Braxton Hicks contractions, but they don't seem quite as regular as they were last week. I still feel light headed at times and sometimes my arms still feel weak, but my blood pressure is still good. I've gained about 30 pounds so far, which is spot on where I was at this time in my last pregnancy. Hope to keep her in there a little longer so she can keep growing and get even stronger!